I hate Spirit Air

Though I despise the company, for some reason I am still on Spirit Air's email list. This means I am occasionally subject to their inane, borderline offensive sexual innuendo sales (see M.I.L.F., Threesome, and Strange sales above). The names of these promotions are innocuous enough to most people, but guaranteed to elicit chuckles from a certain frat boy demographic that understands the double entendres. It's just a guess, but I won't be surprised if on April 20 I get an email about Spirit's "Get High" sale. It seems Spirit is striving to become the airline of choice for male hedonists, given their marketing tactics and range of destinations (Vegas, Florida, many Caribbean beaches). Interesting approach, but it falls flat with me.

I've flown with Spirit twice, once to Guatemala and once to Peru. Both times enticed by absurdly low airfares (3 cents! 8 dollars! -.09!), I quickly learned the drawback of flying with America's only European-style budget airline. Customer service simply does not exist. Though the tip is hidden in the fine print of your confirmation email, passengers are ostensibly able to check their bags in advance, and pay $5 instead of $10. I didn't realize this was possible until the return leg of my second trip, but even then was unable to take advantage of the service. I tried half a dozen times over the course of a week, but the website never worked.

Due to this and subsequent problems with my booking, I decided to write a letter to the company. It took me several phone calls to reach a customer service agent who would give me an address for complaint letters (the first said no such address existed). It's been six months, and still no response. After waiting two months or so, I emailed the letter to the company. A week later I received a form letter, saying I would get a personal response within two weeks. That was four months ago.

Spirit may have introduced America to the airline business model of the future, but I doubt being first to market will keep it the leader. Why? Because Spirit sucks. You catch that clever innuendo, Spirit? Funny, huh? Assholes.

UPDATE: Just got the email about the new "Big S" sale.



Perhaps Sir Mix-a-Lot can shed some light on the hidden meaning of this sale.



UPDATE: The MILF sale returns!